At the breakfast table today, my 6-year old grandson shared some amazingly deep wisdom as his mother, brother, and I were chatting. The boys had been talking about upsets with people at school and his mom and I were suggesting ideas on handling these. He said quite calmly and matter-of-factly, "there will ALWAYS be a Mean lunch lady."
I found that "truth" from the perspective of a young child with eyes looking from infinity's horizon to be so filled with LIFE and awareness. My own trek through some painful terrain with a psychopath and his entire "nutter" clan left me spiritually drained. As I have worked toward answers for my living experiences, perhaps my anguish has been in seeking an "ever-stable" blueprint - and there is none.
"There will always be a mean lunch lady" may be reality on so many tiers of life energy. I noted just recently - three years out from being used, abused, and unceremoniously discarded (L. Scott) - that I am no longer afraid. Fear is a fascinating presence of power and carries such weight in viewpoint coloring. As in the book by Harold Kushner, When Bad Things Happen to Good People, life still goes forward. We seem to seek rationale when in the midst of some terrible ordeal of painful participation in an event.
Perhaps we all look at our trek in this lifetime as if we should be able to have our individuality valued. But this may be a hiccup and a bit of a "trap" in viewing "mysteries." We ourselves must come to terms of who we are and how we wish to "be" in any moment and future time frame. What if it's all as simple as that?
Living this existence with a personal sense of ethical guidelines connects us to a greater whole. Although gray zones appear in the presence of daily activities and thought processes, there seems to be a duality of choices regarding goodness and the feeling of evil. Having survived in a rather hodge-podge method in my journey through the bowels of the "Twilight Zone" with my ex and his family, I have reconnected with myself - I am surely not the same as once I was. Am I better? I am more keenly aware of my selection of options of the angle of interpretation. That's not to say it's always easy and life is now a breeze. Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn implies that "the battleline between good and evil runs through the heart of every man."
Now, however, I have less difficulty in staying true to myself where in the past I felt coerced by religious doctrines of giving endlessly and social evaluations of the look of generous behavior. Oddly, I am willing to aid another and still remain aware that they, too, have their choices. Nassim Haramein suggests that we do create our reality; however, so does everyone else and these colorful overlays affect all the others. I rather like that take on this place in time and space. My accountability now has me not delve intently into the labyrinth of dark acts and personalities because I find myself drawn into the net of attempting to comprehend a reason and plan. For me now, life is to be lived as joyfully as possible. And yet, I know the flip side exists.
M. Scott Peck wrote: "The whole course of human history may depend on a change of heart in one solitary and even humble individual - for it is in the solitary mind and soul of the individual that the battle between good and evil is waged and ultimately won or lost."
